We Need People

As a marriage and sex therapist, I hear this often. “I’m just here to work on me. I want to figure myself out so I don’t have to rely on anyone else.”

And while I respect the intention, I always come back to this simple truth. We need people.

Not just once in a while. Not only when it’s convenient. Not only when we’re feeling good. From the very beginning of life to the very end, connection is part of what keeps us alive. It’s not a weakness or a flaw. It’s a fact.

Even the smallest infant reaches for someone. They don’t survive alone. Neither do we. We might try. We might get really good at doing life on our own. But we will never thrive without connection.

So the question becomes, who do we choose? Who do we let in? Who do we keep at a distance?

That’s up to each of us. Some people feel safe. Some don’t. Some connections build us up. Others leave us drained. Learning to tell the difference is part of the work.

But here’s something I believe deeply. Everyone is worthy of love. Everyone deserves connection. Everyone has value. And that includes you.

Sometimes therapy is where we start to untangle the belief that needing people makes us weak. It doesn’t. Needing others is human. And healing often begins in the presence of another person who can see you, hear you, and walk with you as you grow.

You don’t have to do life alone. And you’re not supposed to.